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How many Facebook/social networking "friends" do you have?


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#1 Fire Blazer

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 01:41 AM

Pretty straightforward. Thought of it when I saw this:

 

"...speaker Barry Meyer recalled a magazine cartoon that stuck in his memory. It showed a casket at the front of a funeral parlor that was nearly empty, with a woman—presumably the widow—commenting: “He has over 2,000 Facebook friends. I was expecting a bigger turnout.” Meyer’s point: Technology may allow for immediate, far-reaching communication. Social media might help connect and network. But don’t mistake digital “friendships” for in-person ones, or allow them to substitute for life’s truly meaningful relationships."

 

Pretty sad, haha, but it has a point. How many of those "friends" on Facebook are real? What are your standards for adding people (or not adding them)? Do you just add anyone? Do you try to get as many people as possible? Only close friends/family? Maybe no family allowed? What are your "rules" for how you determine whether or not to add people as contacts or friends, or follow them on Twitter, or whatever?

 

Personally, I only add people I know (unless it's a special account) and I don't add anyone too close to me like family or family friends lol. The thing with Twitter is that for the most part I don't follow actual people, so yeah, that's not a great example. But when I do, it's generally people with opinions or insight I care about, or related to things I care about, or something.

 


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#2 Snow

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 01:53 AM

I don't really count my Facebook friends as "Friends". I basically add someone they send me a friend request (I think I've personally sent like 20 FR?) and I see them every once in a while. I have... wow exactly 200.

5a05c85a7b4bbce457500ffb604993d4.png

 

As for who I actually consider my friends, mostly people I talk to every day/ almost every day. Exceptions are some of you guys (since I'm not on every day) and some High School friends that I see/talk to about once a month.


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#3 acceptance

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 04:08 AM

Dont remember. Deactivated all my social media accounts and never looked back. Nothin but trouble, if you ask me.
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#4 kirant

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 04:45 AM

47.

 

Most of them are people I actually know.  About 10 are random people on the internet who just use "add friend" on everyone (and I just hit accept because god knows why) and about 5 are people that I know well because of forums


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#5 Mercurius

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 06:01 AM

I think the better question to ask is, how many "friends" in real life are real?

 

It's true, friends over the internet on social media can be as shallow as shallow can possibly be. All they need to do after all, is add a name to a list. They don't have a reason to really want you for anything else.

 

But it's not as if real life relationships for social ladder climbing are better enough to give a shit about them. Relationships that simply happen to be in the flesh(if you get any innuendo out of this, those count too) are extremely overrated for that quality alone.

 

I like internet relationships. You can't get much out of others on them on purpose, so you don't actually look for someone that you're only interested in using temporarily for ulterior motives. A ton of the social bullshit gets thrown out the window, and yet people feel safer than ever regardless. So they are far more likely to be truthful about their feelings and words, or at least whatever lies they make won't have a meaningful impact on anything.


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#6 ^Leo^

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 06:45 AM

I have a Facebook account, but I ignore it entirely. Tried to deactivate it 4 or five times, but it won't go away. I don't actually know how many friends I have on there, but I can guarantee at least 90% are just acquaintances that I enjoy talking to rather than true friends. Thing is I have a really strict definition for what makes a person my friend.

On the other hand I have to agree with mercurius. Internet relationships are easier to deal with. The crap that comes with meeting someone in person can be avoided through the anonymity that the Internet offers. That and it's easier to be honest with people you've never met. There's no real reason to lie to someone if they don't know you after all.

#7 Valke

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 02:24 PM

It's 69. *wink wonk*

 

11053647_1606881792890818_77384209017265

 

Basically added everyone who had sent me friend requests. I'm not really selective, unless I don't like the things they posted or my gut tells me that if adding this person would do harm on me...

 

As for who I consider as true friends, it's those guys that had been sympathetic and helped me with my useless rant about how n00b I am, drawing and art problems. And also those guys who I talked to almost every day. And also those who live in the same area with me. >_> and also those guys that I've stalked countless time because they caught my interest huehuehuehuehue--

 

Most of them are the people I actually know(not really, some of them lives in different country that's far away from mine, so :^) ) and shares the same interest with me. I think about 15 or so are my friends from my school(that I rarely talked to), and about 3 or so are those random people that I add because I admire their work/arts. Orz


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#8 arimibn

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 05:42 PM

I don't like the notion that "real life" friends are better than "internet friends". A friend is a friend, regardless of how you met. And people can be fake, regardless of how you met. The people I consider to be my closest friends are my internet friends. When I went through that suicidal depression phase, can you guess who actually talked to me, gave me advice, and HELPED me? Hint. It wasn't my "real" friends. 

 

On topic, on Facebook

06e8fadad4fb0695091e11a57622178f.png

I currently have 142 friends. And my rule for accepting friend requests is extremely lax. I'll pretty much accept anyone who sends me a friend request.


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#9 kirant

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 06:06 PM

I don't like the notion that "real life" friends are better than "internet friends". A friend is a friend, regardless of how you met. And people can be fake, regardless of how you met.

This is absolutely true.  However, the notion is sometimes that people call others online friends despite not knowing them well enough and not even seeing them as being an actual social relationship.  Consequences of Dunbar's number and all that (which he actually did test this on Facebook to the same conclusion).

 

The idea that someone has hundreds of online friends can mean nothing when all they do is read the person's posts and occasionally hit "Like".  In that sense, I don't think it's that online friends are devalued but that some people may use the term wrong and it damages the meaning. 


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#10 Mercurius

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 06:10 PM

Damages the meaning? The word "friend" is far from being remotely the worst of those.

 

(although this is coming from the person who had only noticed recently that "literally" was commonly being used incorrectly...)

 

On the subject of damaged words, are there any synonyms/replacements for jealousy that aren't also synonyms of envy?


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#11 kirant

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Posted 24 May 2015 - 06:50 PM

Damages the meaning? The word "friend" is far from being remotely the worst of those.

"Online friend".  It should, in theory, just simply mean that it's a friend that you met online.  It's much more synonymous with the non-actual relation that I described above though: a person who really has no social relation with you outside seeing what you post and sometimes hitting a button in agreement.


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#12 Fire Blazer

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Posted 25 May 2015 - 06:16 AM

I think you guys are completely misinterpreting the intention of the original post. All I mean is, how many people are people you actually know/care for/want on your Facebook list, and how many people are like this

 

 

About 10 are random people on the internet who just use "add friend" on everyone

 

and what do you use to determine whether someone is a real friend on your facebook or just someone you just kind of added for some reason and wouldn't actually talk to/communicate with/whatever (though you might not communicate with friends who are actually friends too, but that could be for different reasons besides "this is just some random person/a friend of a friend/a family member of a friend that I added").

 

sorry for the confusion, I think it was the quote that did it so it's my fault (it does mention "digital friendships"). it's fine to discuss it, just an FYI. as for my opinion, while online friends are great in various ways, it does frustrate me that I can't interact with them face-to-face... well, there's video calling, but you know what I mean-in-person and not via the internet. They can't give me a place to stay for the night, they can't hang out with me at a park or at the gym or at the movies, they can't give me real brofists or hugs and whatnot, there's a lot they can't do (barring the exception of meeting them in-person which isn't feasible for most online friends). Seraph is probably my longest-standing friend and one of my best friends overall and he's a guy who lives on a completely different continent, and I pretty much value most of you as friends (even if I don't know you all too well), so I certainly value my online friends a lot. I could go as far as saying that they supported me a lot more than my "IRL" ones ever did and I'd probably be a lot worse off if not for them. At the same time, there were a lot of times they couldn't be there for me a lot of things they couldn't do, so having IRL friends is also important.

 

I guess tl;dr each fills in certain gaps in my needs/wants or something and I appreciate them both. they could both go on my facebook friend list. but random strangers who just want to contact me once about something, get as many friends on their list as possible, etc., I tend to not add those for the most part, unless I feel like I'd insult someone by doing so (it's weird and annoying and the whole social networking thing as a whole can be too subtly convoluted and frustrating that I just don't deal with it anymore, like a lot of people).

 

...

 

checked

 

32 friends on my fake account

 

288 on my actual, with like, 11 pending requests

 

granted, I quit in High School and even then I mostly would only add people I knew that weren't "too close to me like family or family friends", so yeah

 

if I added all the people I met in College and such I'd probably have closer to 500 friends, but alas, I stopped using Facebook

 

even if I wanted to get back into it, it'd be super awkward now. like, haven't talked to these people in years, hardly anything in common, and with new people, they could check my profile and see all my embarrassing posts and other nonsense... T_T NO THANKS, it's easier to just not deal with that then try to build relationships, sadly. maybe if my friends peer pressured me into getting back into facebook, I would, but thankfully they don't, so even though it's a bit sad, I'm kind of content without it. I only really "miss it" the 3-4 times a year I think about it, and I don't even miss it that much, lol


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#13 Sieg

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Posted 08 December 2015 - 03:42 PM

I have around 1,200 Facebook friends. "Science" typically finds that one cannot remember more than 150 names & faces, I find that patently untrue.


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#14 kirant

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Posted 08 December 2015 - 11:06 PM

I have around 1,200 Facebook friends. "Science" typically finds that one cannot remember more than 150 names & faces, I find that patently untrue.

I'd be interested to hear the case for this.  The "science", as you put it, isn't about remembering the name or face but reasonably viewing them as socially human and maintaining human relationships with 100-250 people (typical range reported from Dunbar's research).  I mean, Cracked.com did an article on it when it was good (man, that was a long time ago). 

 

http://www.cracked.c...nkeysphere.html

 

Relating to Facebook, this means that about 100-250 of the 1200 friends you have retain a social relationship.  The rest consist of hitting "Like" or commenting on their posts without really knowing who they are or retaining an intimate social relation.  The example Cracked uses is Osama Bin Laden.  You probably viewed him as a crazy man holed up a cave planning death to America.  But in reality, he's a known Volleyball fan.  He was a suspected diabetic.  He probably had some family drama, and probably had a high school personal life similar to ours...friends, enemies, favourites studies, crushes, and more.  When the study suggests that you have 100-250 social relationships, it suggests you have about 100-250 of the latter where you pictures them as this whole and retain an ongoing relation with that person as oppose to a relation to the former.


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#15 bblues

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Posted 18 December 2015 - 12:14 AM

133.

 

Some are family, then it's old schoolmates, current/past uni friends, one or two from work. I do very little adding, I mostly end up with requests from said people.



#16 Fire Blazer

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Posted 24 December 2015 - 04:55 AM

Apparently I have about 280 friends on Facebook, but that being said I haven't seriously used it since 2012—once high school ended I pretty much stopped using it so as a result I haven't added the... probably hundreds of people I've met in College/since HS. If I did I'm guessing I'd probably have around 500 friends, which is still not a lot compared to some of my more social/popular friends, but eh. Don't really care, which is kinda why I don't use it unless I have some particular reason to.

 

As for Twitter, I've got like, 28 followers or so on my personal ranty one I think, and quite a few of those are just like, random accounts or whatever that follow me, probably hoping that I follow them back. So maybe only 10-15 are actual people following me, idk. As for my FEBuzz Twitter, I have almost 1500 followers, and I'm guessing a good 70% are legit (maybe more, idk) though I don't have any evidence of that, haha. Still, I do get a fair amount of interaction from people, so yeah.


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#17 Blue Leafeon

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Posted 24 December 2015 - 02:19 PM

Most of my "friends" are either church people or family that I honestly have no idea how I'm related to them. I would get friend requests on facebook and go "who the heck is X?" My mom would usually response with "your cousin" or something of the sort, and I'd just be like "okay."

 

I rarely use facebook, to be honest. I only ever log on when I'm bored or feel the need to complain about something. (For example. last night I logged on to complain about Christmas songs always being about snow and winter wonderlands, while we were having thunderstorms and flood/tornado warnings.)


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#18 Knight of Argentum

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Posted 24 December 2015 - 11:49 PM

All of my facebook friends are people I go to/went to school with or immediate relatives

I can remember all of them

#19 Fire Blazer

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Posted 28 December 2015 - 07:06 AM

All of my facebook friends are people I go to/went to school with or immediate relatives

I can remember all of them

 

ha

 

boring

 

do you not have a lot, or is your memory just good


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#20 Knight of Argentum

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Posted 28 December 2015 - 08:52 AM



 

ha

 

boring

 

do you not have a lot, or is your memory just good

 

It's a combination of both, sadly. I don't have a lot, but I have a fantastic memory for faces and people.






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