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#1 Nice Middle

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 05:28 PM

Introduction

During Blazer’s golden age of tyrannical reign on the Shrine, revolts were bursting outside and around his Palace... While this little civil war was carrying on, thieves and burglars broke into the castle to rob it of treasures.

Main characters

Pie
This red-and-black-haired young guy lives off the streets, living off stealing and mugging. He joins the party for fun.

Howl
A blue-haired thief who is adept at unlocking chests and doors. He has been invited by Calad.

Nayr
Even though well-meaning and quiet, this blonde man decided follow the thieves because he didn’t feel the Webmaster’s recent laws were justified. He holds a little business here and there in the Shrine, and was once a member of Shu’s mafia.

Caladbolg
A brown-haired man from the parallel world of France. He’s mature but still a kid inside. He joined the team for excitement. Is talented with all kinds of ropes.

Luc the Whiny Wind Boy
This white-haired, pale-skinned guy seems to be a random dude that joined the team just for treasure, but he is secretly a minister of Blazer and currently being held hostage by Nayr. Neither Pie, Howl or Calad are aware, and no one knows what’s behind his big black shades.

___________________________________________________________

Prologue

Luc put the mine on the wall while Calad was unwinding the long thread connected to the detonator. Howl, Pie and Nayr were hiding in the broken bit of wall, waiting to jump inside once the bomb exploded.

The Whiny Wind Boy stepped back slowly.
“Ready?” he whispered. “Go!”
Calad pushed on the detonator and the others fell into the castle through the hole. They finally did it. They finally entered into Blazer’s chests room.

Calad threw himself onto a mountain of golden coins and then tried to swim in it. It didn’t really work.
At first, Nayr wasn’t very excited. But now that he was stashing jewelry in his satchel, he found it attractive.
Luc took a silver coffee cup and sat down, watching it and waiting. Stealing from his leader would leave a bad taste in his mouth.
Pie wasn’t really interested by all that shining gold. He threw his hand into a heap of jewels and felt something hard. He removed a beautiful blue stone. There was no need to tell the others. He would keep it for himself.
The refrigerator was in the chests room too. So Howl picked out a hamburger and ate it.

When their pockets were full of stuff, the five friends decided to talk before leaving.
“Hey, I suggest we should go into the deepest rooms of the Palace,” said Howl. “There must probably be the kitchen there, and we could eat a bit of Blazer's favorite kind of beef before leaving."
“What? That’s… suicidal…” Nayr sighed, while being pervaded by some exciting feeling.
“Uh... I'm not hungry,” protested Luc with a blush.
“Oh, come on, give it a try,” Pie shrugged.
“I’ve never liked beef and don’t know much about it,” admitted Calad. “But if you would like to, then we could stop by there.”

They finally agreed, then moved discreetly in order to avoid the guards (though there wasn’t supposed to be many of them. A bunch of them were supposed to be outside, trying to calm down the revolts).

Suddenly, Pie walked inside a security camera’s point of view. The alarm resounded in every room in the palace.
They threw the satchels down and ran as fast as they could, not knowing where they were headed. Way behind them, the soldiers’ footsteps and a terrible voice’s echo were also resounding through the shadowy walls.
“KILL THEM! BURN THEM! CUT THEM! SLICE THEM! EAT THEM!”
It was Seraphinox, the cruelest of Blazer’s generals. He is rumored to be a cannibal.

Luc opened a door and got inside, followed by his team. They ran as far as they could and didn’t even notice the lava and red rocks around them.
They ended up running when the menacing voices stopped echoing.
“Where are we?!” Nayr whispered to Luc.
“I don’t know! I had no idea there was such a place under the palace!”

Howl sat down and Calad suddenly had an idea.
“Don’t panic guys!” Calad said. “We just have to consult the map of the Palace. Pie, give me the map, please.”
“Oh, the map?” Pie said. “Yeah, it was in my satchel with the treasures.”
They hoped Pie was joking, but seeing as he wasn’t beginning to laugh, they feared for their lives.
Especially when, from what they’ve heard, there usually were red living beings with hammers, wanting to eat the intruders.
“Oh, you sick bastard!” Howl yelled. “No gold, no map, no hope of survival! That’s that!”
The silence came back. Pie put a hand in his pocket… and felt something…
“Oh, guys!” he exclaimed. “We’re not lost! I kept it!”
The companions suddenly stopped breathing when they saw the shining, beautiful blue stone.
“Give it to me!” Calad said.
“Wait, what? No, it’s mine!”
“GIVE IT TO ME, YOU FOOL!”
He punched Pie in the face. Then, the stone fell down… and broke. Suddenly, shining sparkles hit the heroes, who fell unconscious to the hot ground.

Later, Howl woke up with a terrible headache. And while the others were waking up, he slowly stared at the background. It was the day. And there was no wall, rock or lava around them. Just… ruins. Ruins everywhere and dried blood on ground.
“Guys… either we destroyed the Palace and the Shrine or we’ve gone ten years later in the future!”
“Maybe both, Cal… maybe both…”

To be continued.

___________________________________________________________________

Thanks to Bobryk for the bit of fixing he has done.
Thanks to Bobryk and Nayr for writing advices.
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#2 SmashedFish

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 05:33 PM

I doubt Luc would even be a minion of Blazer, and also she's a chick. tongue.gif

Nice nontheless.

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#3 Nice Middle

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 05:39 PM

Luc is known to be a Whiny Wind Boy on this forum, so she'll stay a guy. >o<

Plus, I had to pick up five guys for the plot. (S)he is one of the most convenient for this.
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#4 Axel

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Posted 09 May 2012 - 07:36 PM

Why am I such a dunce? LOL
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#5 Howl

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 10:04 AM

Who's idea was it to sully my name with talks of rape, and plundering. There's no honor in any of that.... Grumble grumble....



#6 arimibn

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 01:11 PM

"Rape"

What.
The.
****.
Man.

Other than that, it was pretty interesting.
"You'll never forgive me? Like I give a damn."
"You got a jacked up notion of fair play pal...and it's beginning to piss me off."
"Though a fight every now and again does make life a little more interesting...dontcha think?"
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#7 Nice Middle

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 01:21 PM

Well, what's wrong?
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#8 arimibn

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 01:26 PM

The talk of rape. That's what I don't like.
"You'll never forgive me? Like I give a damn."
"You got a jacked up notion of fair play pal...and it's beginning to piss me off."
"Though a fight every now and again does make life a little more interesting...dontcha think?"
Posted Image
^ This isn't dead, I swear!
Most of my closest friends have qualities that I despise. But I love them all regardless of their faults.
"Why are we trying to narrow God's mercy? I didn't realize there was a limit to how many people could go to heaven."

This will not be removed until I finish my Sprite Series. Arim and AJ VS The World Started December 19, 2013 (I actually still haven't given up on this! XD)

This will not be removed until The Demon Invasion is finished. Started December 19, 2013 (Hue)

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#9 Howl

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:22 PM

Lols at beef. Better I suppose.

#10 Nice Middle

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:24 PM

You... weren't hating me, were you?
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#11 Nice Middle

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:32 PM

Chapter 1

After a bit of resting, the fives thieves decided to go downtown to be looking for someone. But the Capital was empty. There were only ruins, ruins, ruins, ruins again. And dried blood here and there.

“Dammit!” Luc yelled. “Aren’t there any people anymore?”
“There must be someone, somewhere. We can’t be alone in the whole world, can we?”
“Shut up, Pie! If you hadn’t let that stone fall down, we’d be rich and have golden balls right now!”

The group decided to sit down in the most comfortable place possible, which was a house with only two walls and the half of a straw roof that would protect them from rain, for the least.
Howl used his waistcoat to cover himself for the night. Luc the Whiny Wind Boy stretched out on a rocky beam. Pie meant to be hiding behind his black cape, wanting to sleep. Nayr sat down on the hay. Calad took a rope out of his pocket, and tied his own hands and feet together – it would keep him hot, and he knew how to untie himself easily.
And evening came quickly.

“I’m hungry.”
“Shut up Calad. We’re all hungry.”

The French one was considering everything that happened. The thieves, the treasures in the satchels, Seraphinox’s soldiers… the lava place, and… the blue stone. Everything happened because of the stone… no. It only happened because he punched Pie. That’s silly.
But what’s with the Shrine? There is no one in the streets, and the Capital is in ruins now.

“I… suggest one of us should stay awake to keep an eye on the others”, he shouted at Nayr. “Just to make sure nothing happens to us while we’re sleeping.”
“Ok, I’ll begin,” replied the blonde one.

Night fell down early.
The following morning… daylight broke through Nayr’s closed eyes while a strange noise could be heard. When he woke up, he realized that Calad was looking at him.
“Did you… hear a noise too?” Nayr asked.
“No, I just have to go pee, for my part.”
The blonde young man looked at his right, and saw Howl snoring.
“Uh. Hold on, who was supposed to be the guard right now?”
“Wasn’t it Pie?”
“YES!”
Nayr, with an evil smile, put all his strength in his arm, and punched Pie.
“Gah! What…?”
“Wake up, child! I’ve heard a noise! Go around looking for something disturbing!”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m going…”
The black-and-red-haired boy took the direction of the downtown.
“By the way, where is Luc?” Asked Nayr, seeing the Whiny Wind Boy was no longer on his beam.”
“Don’t know.”
“For hell’s sake! Did he escape?”

Pie spat on the ground as he was walking around with a long, wooden stick in his left hand, just in case. Yeah, he knew that it was a totally useless weapon, but it’s still a weapon, after all.
He headed to a dark street at his right, and then bumped into someone.
“Aaaah! Who’s there?!” Pie screamed.
But there was no one. Weird. And before he could even move again, he felt something hitting his nape, making him faint.

Luc had gone to make some steps in the Capital. There was nobody, as seen in the previous day. The doubt suddenly pervaded the Whiny Wind Boy. Was… was he really one of the culprits? No, that’s impossible. He loved the Shrine so much. He didn’t do that on purpose! Yes, that’s it! Not on purpose!
When he finally came back to his eventual home, none of the thieves was there. Howl wasn’t snoring anymore, and no coverage was lying around. Wait… did they leave him alone? No! No, it couldn’t be!
He suddenly feared that someone would attack him. So he turned back, ran while four minutes and forty-seven seconds and screamed like a little girl.
He stopped in an empty place. Sweat was trickling down on his black shades.

Then, someone discreetly approached Luc by behind and threw him an electric discharge by a shot of a special model of gun. The white-haired minister was lying on the floor after that.

The stranger put a black mobile phone next to his ear, and shouted:
“We’ve got the last one, sir. We’re coming home now.”

To be continued.
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#12 Howl

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:35 PM

Hate is a word for people who sully my honor or make a mockery of my pride. You've done neither.

I find this story mildly entertaining if not for the characters randomness. I would question how I determined that we were exactly 10 years in the future, rather then perhaps in the past or future by a vague assumption of time.

#13 Nice Middle

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:41 PM

It was just a speculation. And if it was ten years in the past, you would have known that it couldn't be the case. You were 11 (well, 7 in Visitors) and the Shrine wasn't in ruins.

You should know that our IRL ages aren't respected here. We're all 17.

And SSSSHHHHSPOILERSSSSHHHH

x (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)
The blue stone is the Future Stone. But that'll be explained later.


SSSSSHHHH
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#14 Howl

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:49 PM

.... It could have been hundreds of years in the past or future for all I know.... But write it as you will.

#15 Axel

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 07:55 PM

Stop punching me, god dammit. >_<
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#16 SmashedFish

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Posted 11 May 2012 - 03:46 PM

*punches Pie from beyond the veil of existence*

I hope I'm in this, somehow. That'd be awesome.

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#17 Strange Razorback

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Posted 11 May 2012 - 03:51 PM

yo this is pretty sweet

#18 Nice Middle

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Posted 11 May 2012 - 05:59 PM

Chapter Two is written! But you can't read it HAHAZ =P

No seriously, will post it once Howl had checked it out.
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.


#19 Howl

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Posted 11 May 2012 - 11:50 PM

Why me...?

#20 Nice Middle

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 11:25 AM

Chapter 2

As Howl woke up, he realized that he was stretched out on a very uncomfortable bed. He had thirst. But nonetheless, he had perfectly slept. However, he had no idea of how he came there.
Indeed, Howl didn’t see any of his friends in the room, so he was alone in an unknown place. He wasn’t afraid but was not reassured either. His intelligent mind knew that something was wrong. Why would anyone take him away and put him on a so hard bed? If his friends would have wanted to get rid of him, they would have left without moving him. He perfectly knew it because it happened a lot of times when they were going camping, but he never understood why.
He stands up and heads to the only door viewable in the room. As there was only one open window, only a blue light was getting in and could allow him to get bearings.
He turned down the latch but the door resisted. It was locked. But there didn’t seem to be any lock on the door, so how…?
”Hey! Is someone there?” he screamed while knocking on the frozen metal of the door. “Get me out of here!"
And as if it was replying to him, the door opened – not putting itself on the side like every normal door, but going to be built-in up in the ceiling.
Howl felt like swimming in science-fiction and imagined that extra-terrestrial people had abducted him to make some experiences on his body. And it truly scared him.
However, the guy that appeared behind the open door didn’t look like anything of an extra-terrestrial: not small nor green, no disproportioned skull. It was just a member of the Shrine, like Howl. Except that he looked a lot like someone the blue-haired thief used to know.
The unknown man walked forward and the blue light of the room could finally enlighten his face now. He had a crazy green hair and a big scar on the right eye. However, despite these differences, Howl recognized him without a doubt, as well:
“Holy Kensai! Oh my god, what happened to you?!”
Howl ran to hug his friend, happy to meet him again. But he only did three steps that Kensai, as fast as lightning, got a gun out of a holster tied to his belt.
“Don’t move, you shit! I don’t know if you and your friends have been sent by the Three, but the fact that you look like Howl won’t be get me wrong. My friend is dead in the cataclysm that happened ten years ago. I won’t let you fool me, replica.”
“What???”
Howl just didn’t get it. Cataclysm? Ten years? Dead? The Three? Replica? He didn’t understand anything that his friend was saying, and neither the fact that he was so aggressive.
“What do you mean, Kensai... it’s me! What are you talking about? And what is that Cataclysm? I don’t get anything of what you’re saying!"
“Shut up, replica. And don’t call me Kensai. A little crap like you must call me Holy Kensai of Clan Kensai. I am Holy Kensai, the Angel who saw the Hells.”
He touched the scar on his own face, and gave a defying look at Howl.
“This scar is what I got from there.”

Luc was a bit shocked since he got an electric discharge when he was outside. Now he was alone in a shadowy, circular room.
He was waiting since hours. Did his captors forget him? To make the time pass, he intended to sleep. But sadly, the door began to open in a strange hiss.
Luc stood up and got ready to face his destiny. A tall man entered in the room. He had a big scar on the eye. Seeing that was horrible.
“Ah. You’re late. Are you coming to give me the last meal of the convicted prisoner?” Luc said, being ironic.
The other one spat a mucus on the floor, in which were mixing blood and saliva.
“Get out of here, Whiny Wind Boy. I made a judgment mistake. In any case, you aren’t replicas. I don’t know how you’ve got to disappear that long, but everyone thought you were dead since a long time ago.”
“Wait, what? Why would we be dead since a long time ago?”
“Don’t worry about it. I will explain later. When your companions will have been taken to the reunion room. We have a lot to tell each other, it seems”.
The man with the scar turned back and got out. Luc hesitated a bit, then followed him.
They followed long hallways that were enlightened by a blue light that seemed to come from the ceiling.
After at least fifteen intersections that looked like each one, they stopped before a great red door.
“Get in and wait. Your friend is already here. I’m going to bring the others back here. There are alimentary rations and drinks for everyone in this room.”
Luc discovered the huge room. It was nothing like that crappy cell! The blue light getting out of the ceiling was giving a mystic look to the atmosphere.
Then, he trusted seeing a silhouette near the bottom of the room. Il se pencha par-dessus la balustrade pour mieux voir et plissa les yeux. He finally recognized Howl, who was eating some kind of chocolate bar.
“Howl! Howl!” Luc exclaimed. “I’m here”!
Howl looked at the left and his eyes became shining too. But he suddenly spat what he just ate. The Whiny Wind Boy goes down to join his friend who ended vomiting between two chairs of the reunion room.
“Those energetic foods are disgusting!” he yelled. “And their water smells like piss. Future is so bad!”
Luc approached a bit more.
“Future? What are you talking about? I don’t understand. “
“Don’t worry, Holy Kensai will explain everything soon. Though he’s busy looking for Pie, Nayr and Calad.”
Things were getting even more complicated in Luc’s mind . But what happened? Since they broke the blue stone, everything was going wrong. How could have they gone in the future? And especially, why does the future suck so much, with the Capital being devastated and stuff?
However, he had to be patient, and wait for answers.

Holy Kensai was walking fast in direction of the north-western side of his base, near the 1-73 quarter, the one of the cells. He was swearing. Why did he have the idea of putting each one so far from the others? If he had locked all of them in the same room, he wouldn’t have to walk so far nor waste so much time.
As the leader of the Clan Kensai, he could have asked his men to bring the five guys right to the reunion room. Sadly, they all were in vacation because the Capital seemed to be calm. The calm before the tempest. He wanted them to profit of this fragile peace while there was no danger, even if he had to walk so much. He finally arriver before the bloc number 47-8A and activated the door’s opening, then came inside.
“Pie. I would like you to follow me. I’ll explain everything once you guys are together.”
Without waiting anymore, he got out of the cellar. Pie’s steps were resounding behind him now. He didn’t want to turn back. He didn’t want his friend to recognize him. Not yet.
However he still couldn’t believe it. Pie, Howl and Nayr, his best friends were alive. They were supposed to be dead after the Cataclysm that ravaged the entire Shrine, ten years ago. And now, they reappear with Calad and Luc. He first thought they were replicas sent by the Three, in attempt to get him wrong.
But, when he began to question Howl, the details that the blue-haired thief was giving about their old friendship couldn’t be the work of a simple replica, a machine with a minimized brain. But how could that be? Of all the people present in the Palace, they were the only survivors? Blazer, Seraphinox, Tino, Grey Tensho, and everyone else... Everyone died, except these five thieves.
Holy Kensai, Howl and Pie were childhood friends. As for Nayr, they knew each other when they were both in Shu’s mafia.
Lost in his thoughts, he lately realized that he just arrived before Nayr’s cell. He took a look behind him, and saw that Pie was still following him.
He opened the door. So Caladbolg was the only one left.

There was only one thing to say! The atmosphere truly smelled! Nayr was following Pie and the man with scar since five big minutes and except this one who told him to get out, no one said any word.
They finally stopped near a cell and the man did again his little game of opening the door and telling the prisoner to get out. Nayr was surprised when he saw that it was Calad. So the French one got caught too... He hoped Howl and Luc had escaped.
Nonetheless, when the man with the scar closed the cell’s door, his face was slowly reminding Pie of someone. Could that be…? No. He knew no one with a so bad face – except Bobryk or Shu, maybe.
Calad came near his captor, and discreetly punched Pie.
“It’s your fault if we’re here now!” he shouted.
“Gah! It hurts!!”
“Silence!” ordered the man. “Let’s join Luc and Howl, who’re waiting for us in the reunion room.”

Calad didn’t get what was happening, and supposed he wasn’t alone in that case. He was speaking with Nayr in the kinda house, when he felt something stinging his nape, making him faint. But he woke up in a terrible, smelling cell, and now he has to follow a man that just looks like Scarface who wants to explain something.
Being in a bad mood, he wanted to kick Pie and feel better, but it would make the situation worse, anyhow. He kept his angriness in himself until Scarface stopped before a big, red gate and entered a code to open it. Then, they entered.

Now they were in the reunion room. There were at least one thousand chairs. Calad shrugged. He didn’t get what a chair had to do with their abduction.
Screams coming his way kept his attention. He looked at his right and saw that Luc and Howl were coming.
And then, it became very emotional for the team, now reunited. Some began to cry, Pie got punched twice, and the last ones were letting their joy going out by dancing and singing. All of this was so much shambles, that Holy Kensai preferred to stop them before these monsters could begin to destroy everything on their way.
“Ahem. Well, now that you are all here, let me introduce myself. I am Holy Kensai of the Kensai Clan, but call me Kensai.”
“Kensai? Is it really you?” asked Pie. “But what happened to your eye?”
“I’m going to tell you everything I know, and then, you will tell me what you were doing here. But now, be quiet.”
Everyone agreed with Kensai’s orders. They were glad to know he was alive, but also worried about what happened to him and to the Capital.
Holy Kensai cleared his throat and began his tale:
“Ten years ago, the Shrine has been ravaged by a cataclysm that seemed to be from the Palace. Almost everything has been destroyed. Blazer, as well as other people is dead. It was horrible. I was there when it happened, luckily I survived. With all these victims, the civil war ended. So we began rebuilding. We thought we could finally live in peace. Unfortunately, we didn’t. The Three appeared, and crowned themselves as the new leaders of the Shrine. No one knows who they really are, but they are incredibly strong, and have an army. Blazer could be an angel, next to them. They are… the new gods of the Shrine.”
A long silence attacked each of them. Each one was calculating the results of this event. There could be only one explanation: it was their fault. It was clear, the blue stone that they’ve stolen was the cause of this. And all those people died without knowing what really happened.
“And then?” Pie asked.
“Then? Then, revolution teams have come to life. The Kensai Clan is one of them but there’s another one, as powerful as mine. The Shu Clan. But sadly, any people that get caught by the Three are damned and sent to the Hole.”
”The Hole? What is it?”
"It’s a never-ending hole. Whoever is thrown in it doesn’t have any chances of survival. It’s the capital punishment. To unmask us, the Three use replicas. These are clones of us, but whose autonomy is weak. I first thought you were some evolved replicas, but you have the memories of my past friends. You can’t be replicas."

Later on, Pie was washing himself in his new room. He thought of everything that has been said. He felt like he was the responsible of the Cataclysm. If he didn’t let that damn stone fall, nothing would have happened. He didn’t even know who was alive and who was dead. It was horrible and it was a weight on his conscience.
He got out of the shower, dried himself and put some futurist clothes on. He had to do something to fix the situation.
He suddenly had the right idea. He and the thieves had to come back where everything had began. The Palace! He got out of his room and was now facing the white walls on which the blue light was reflecting. As fast as he did, the doors in front of and next to his room opened. Nayr, Howl, Calad and Luc got out too.
“You think of the same thing that I do? » Pie asked.”
“Yep, if you mean punching you again, that’s for sure! Lol no. We should return there, right?”
“To the Palace! Let’s go onward, guys!”
QUOTE (Fire Blazer @ Jul 25 2014, 07:59 PM)
I have cero love for you or your shenanigans

QUOTE (Holy Kensai @ May 18 2012, 08:01 PM)
Gotta love how even in fan fiction I'm a badass.





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