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*Untitled Story*

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#1 Felover3



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Posted 30 November 2008 - 12:29 PM

Chapter 1
The entire back side of my body itched. “Why” is a question one would normally put into this situation. “Why am I here?” would be anyone’s first question actually. But for me, the question was far from it. I spoke, and heard a voice I did not recognize say, “Whom am I?”. Even though I wished to explore the voice, and who I was, I needed to see something other than black darkness, which reminded me that my eyes must be closed.
I decided it was time I opened my eyes, and the world exploded with color. The sky was a nice shade of blue, warming and welcoming, and very relaxing. The birds flying above in circles were white, and sang a marvelous tune, which I could barely comprehend myself, let alone explain it. The sun was at the corner of my left eye, which means I had to squint a little bit to see.
I looked down, and saw what seemed to be my body. I was wearing a white, short sleeved, shirt, of which my arms, which looked pretty average, were coming out of and remained on my torso. My skin seemed to be a pretty tan color, probably from laying here for who knows how long. I saw what looked like shorts, with a beige color, and adjustable waistline. I sat there watching my diaphragm expand and collapse as I breathed through my nose, which is until I noticed something about what I was laying on. It was also a beige like color, and very soft. It had a slight sheen to it and was very warm. It felt very nice, but it made the back side of me very itchy still.
I tried to move my legs, to get off this itchy beige powder, but to no avail. My legs seemed to be made of jelly at that moment, and needed to rest a little before trying to stand. I dug my hand into the powder, and felt it go through my fingers, and drop to its place. I decided that since I could not get up, I mind as well try to see where I was.
I decided to look to my left, and saw a majestic scene. The powder continued for what seemed like forever, and into the sky, with various objects on top of it. There were some trees near the powder, but not touching them. They seemed to be wearing plate armor, due to the way the bark was on them. ON top of them, was a green nut, and below the tree, brown ones. The powder eventually subsided, and gave way to a green field of green blades of some plant. It was truly a heartwarming moment, but I still felt incomplete. I don’t know who I am, where I am, why I am where, when I got here, how I got here, and above all, who else is here?
Staring at the powder gave me strength enough to move my legs, and with all the might I could muster, I got up. A lot of powder fell off my body, a waterfall of warm and shining powder, giving almost a magical appearance. It felt strange to be using my legs for support, as far as I can remember, a whole 5 minutes or so, I didn’t know how to stand. Now that I was standing however, I felt like there was nothing I couldn’t do, a childish thought, yet the only way to describe it.
I started to walk along the powder, where I had looked before. The powder made it harder for me to move my legs, and I fell quite a lot, landing in the powder, but got back up slowly, but surely. It would seem to anyone watching that I was stumbling along, without any goal, just to see what I could find. In truth, that was probably correct, but it didn’t matter. I knew I had to go this way, something is on this majestic site has to be good, maybe even let me know who I am.
The sun slowly descended as I walked, and by the time I took a break to see where I was, the sun had already almost disappeared, behind me, the magical dust, which now seemed to be a pink color, in the illumination of the sky and the sun. This was the most gorgeous thing I had seen so far, the sky, the sun, and the powder all agreeing in color and shade, to make for an almost seamless rift.
As I turned around, I saw a river, flowing into a larger water source, not at a break neck speed, but still at a pretty brisk pace. I just now realized that this water source was the ocean, and it to reflects to pink sun’s rays, making the seamless rift of before complete.
As I watched this sight, it occurred to me that I was solitary. No other people were probably with me, the very thought of such a horrific disaster scared me. It felt as if I was meaningless and small, with no purpose.
Tears filled my eyes, and they rolled down my cheeks in an avalanche of water. I tried to stop myself, but that deep meaning in my existence here weighed down on my conscious. As I stood in my depression, the sun cascaded out of the sky into the abyss, leaving me in complete darkness.
It took me a long time to get over that thought of solitude, and by the time I was ready to start slowly picking up my feet, the darkness around me was strong, surrounding me with the black abyss that is night. The never ending darkness which seemed to consume me never faded, even as I walked through it. I was only guided by the senses in my feet, since I happened to be wearing sandals. The magical substance beneath my feet was my savior, while the abyss around me seemed to want me to convert, give up, and be eaten by it.
The farther I walked, the more it seemed I wanted to give up. The abyss did its job quite well. I guess it was time to die, sit there, and wait until the darkness around me destroys me.
The end never came however, and as I waited, staring at the lifeless moon above me, waiting for something to just end the darkness. It seemed as if I was waiting for a millennia, listening to the changes around me, but not appreciative or with passion. The moon never seemed to move, and the wind seemed to have stopped. I closed my eyes, with the only difference being that the moon was gone.
I thought about how I was going to die alone, without loved ones, and not even knowing my name. I saw a light in the distance, and I tried to go towards it, but it inched towards me slower and slower. I had given up all hope at this point, until I awoke with a sudden pain in my leg. As I looked to see what had caused this, I saw a crab, which had pinched off some of my skin, and blood trickled down my leg with a hot sensation, and grueling agony. I screamed with all the emotions left in my forsaken heart, screamed for what I will never understand. Was it the pain? Was it the last thing everyone did before the light came and rescued them?
As I ran out of breath, and my screaming subsided, I drifted into a state of which bewildered me. I watched a show of outstanding colors and lights, and then I was in a blank room which was completely dark, until a door appeared with light under the crack. I turned the handle, and light exploded into my eyes and I gasped as I raised my head up. Only…I was in a cave…

Chapter 2
The cave was a house of darkness, obscuring my vision until the light pouring in from the left of me flooded into the cave, creating an effect only able to be full of light, but giving no warmth. My leg no longer hurt, but I noticed a wrap of gauss around it, now red in color. The sight but an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, which was now howling in pain as an animal caught in the hunter’s trap, waiting to be freed or to be cut short, to no longer have to endure the agony it faced.
As I tried to move my injured leg a thousand daggers entered it and I screamed with the voice of a tortured victim, with escape so near, yet the judgment of their tormentor forbids them to escape what is to become their tome. The pain remained even after
The Legendary Lurker

"When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes and steal whatever the hell life gave them." ~Me

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#2 Ramiel


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Posted 30 November 2008 - 05:34 PM

Good start. I dont know what happend to chapter. 2 but more then half is not there.

#3 Dath


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Posted 30 November 2008 - 06:21 PM

He does that, for some reason. I don't know why...(WHY!?)

Anyway, its interesting. Hope you continue it. *Goes back to writing his own story.*



#4 Tino


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Posted 30 November 2008 - 06:52 PM

I like how you surprised me with your grammar and spelling, since those usually aren't very good (although not bad, either) when you're posting elsewhere on the forum. Not to mention the story's very interesting. Good job. I anticipate more wink.gif

Also, he probably hasn't finished chapter 2 yet, but I guess he has just posted part of it already since he finished that already anyway.

#5 Sothe



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Posted 04 December 2008 - 02:58 PM

You're really good. Interesting story, good grammar. Two thumbs up from the spammar.
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