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Retribution


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#1 Cheshire

Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:07 PM

I thought I'd finally share with you all here at FEShrine a sprite-fic I made a. Because of the poor review it got it will most likely be discontinued, but it's here for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy!

Retribution


Story Info (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

Summary

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Cast

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~ Jory
A sensible young man caught in a world of trouble.
Relies on his friends for strength and always defends his honor.
Thrown from his home by a shadowy stranger, he now searches
for a way back.

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~ Ven
Straight forward and courageous, honest and loyal, but sometimes careless.
He travels with his childhood friend in search of his lost homeland in
Oakridge.

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~ Cole
Little is known about the mysterious Desert Wanderer, but his son,
Cole, accompanies the two lost friends, Jory and Ven. Most his life
has been spent training with his father in the desert.
Submission by Exdee

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~ Ashur
The Desert Wander, sometimes considered a legend.
Discovered Jory and Ven stranded in the desert. He takes them in
and trains them along with his son, Cole. Sending the three young men
on their journey, is he really helping the two find their lost home?

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~ Jackson
Another mysterious figure, addresses himself only as Jackson.
Old friends with the Desert Wanderer, though not much else is known.
Clad in a dark suit of armor, looks as though he belongs to the military.
Submission by Maverick

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~ Melody
Strange girl who ran into the group at the port town of Stone Coast.
Uses a special charm spell to get what she desires.
Little is known about her or her motives.
Original sprite-work by TheReaper



Map

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_______

Prologue:
Kidnapped

Part One (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)
Boy: Ah... What a wonderful day to be alive!

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Girl: Hey wait up!

Boy: C'mon Sis! Keep up!

Girl: *Huff *Huff* Why'd you run off so fast? I told you I wanted to go straight home.

Boy: But check out these ruins! This place is amazing?

Girl: Something here makes me feel uneasy. Can we get going now?

Boy: Why? We just got here, plus these old buildings are more interesting than the ones standing in our village. How long do you think this castle has been here?

Girl: Who knows... Come on, let's go, Jory. It's getting late.

Jory: No way, not yet. I'm not leaving until I find something I can bring back to show Ven. I'm gonna go check out over here.

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...

Jory: Woah! Mary Check it out! I think I found some dead guy's bones..

Mary: Ugh, so gross. I hope he doesn't bring them over here. Great here, he comes.

Jory: *Gasp

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Mary: What! What is it!? It looks like you've just seen a ghost.

Jory: Uh.. nothing. It was nothing. I think it's time we went back home now...

Mary: OK... You're starting to weird me out. What's wrong?

Jory: I don't know... I must be.. tired, or hungry, or something.

Mary: Or something? Well that's wonderful. If we're done here I'll be leaving. Don't hang around too long..

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Jory: (This isn't real.. Just pretend nothing happened) W-w-wait for me.

Mary: I can't believe I let him drag me all the way out here... Stupid brother always has his way. "Ooh! Look over heeeere." Blah blah blah. So stupid... *Mumble

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Jory: Wait!!

...

Mary: Finally home. At least we've made it back before, wait. When did it become so dark?

Jory: This is creepy, sis. Something feels wrong.

Mary: Like what? You've been acting strange for a while now, mind telling me what's got you so shaken?

Jory: Uh, well. How does one put this. I think I'm being watched. By phantoms or ghouls. Whatever it is, I'm freaked out.

Mary: Hahahaha.. Must be your imagination. Some much for Jory, the brave adventurer.

Jory: Hey! Take that back!

Mary: Try breathing or something. And stop getting so close to me!

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Jory: I'm serious! There was something back there.

Mary: You're just trying to scare me.

Jory: Fine. Don't believe me.

Mary: You better not go back there alone.

Jory: I wasn't plann-

???: You there.

Jory: !?!

???: Your sister, she comes with me.

Mary: Who's there!?

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???: Hehehehe

Jory: Sis....

Mary: Jory! Stay back!

???: If you go quietly, I'll spare your brother. Hehehe...

Jory: She's not going anywhere!

???: Alright then, have it your way.

Mary: Jory!

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Jory: Mary, nooooooo!


---
END Part One

QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#2 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:09 PM

Alright. Here's part two of the prologue.
---

Prologue:
Lost

Part Two (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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*Knock *knock

Kid's voice: I've got it!

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Jory: Thank goodness it's you.

Kid: Jory? What's going on!? What are you doing here so early?

Jory: Ven, there's no time to explain. I need your help. Quickly, follow me.

Ven: What? Does this have to do with your sister?

Jory: Wait, how do you know about my sister?

Ven: All I know is that you two went missing last night. Your parents-

Jory: Tell me on the way. We can't waste any more time. Hurry up.

Ven: Come on, Jory. It's to early for this...

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Ven: Ow, your pulling my arm. Were I'm I going?

Jory: Yesterday I brought my sister down to the old ruins...

Ven: Wow! There are ruins nearby? That's so cool.

Jory: Listen. We weren't the only ones there.

Ven: Yeah right, now your gonna tell me the place is haunted.

Jory: Maybe.

Ven: Wait, what?

Jory: Something followed us home... Whatever it was now has my sister. He made her disappear into thin air.

Ven: Mary's been kidnapped? We have to go rescue her!

Jory: I knew I could count on you. Here, take this stick with you. The two of us can take that creepy molester guy.

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Ven: Woah, the ruins... Look. you're right. Someone's here.

Jory: That's him. What do we do? I could distract- no. if we take him buy surprise...

Ven: Hey you!!

Jory: No, you idiot!...

???: ...

Ven: Hey! You better bring Mary back right now!.. I'm talking to you over here!

???: ...

Jory: Come on Ven, maybe this was a bad idea.

Ven: He looks pretty weak to me. We can take this guy.

Jory: Your right.. Alright then!

Ven: Prepare yourself, creep!

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???: Foolish children. You think I would be caught off gaurd? I chose to reveal myself.

Jory: What?

???: Yet, you were brave enough to come back here. How naive.

Ven: You're really starting to piss me off, creep. Bring my friend's sister back now!

???: Such a brat. I've already said enough... *Hmmmmm....

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*Vnnn..

Ven: That, was it? Now you're gonna get it, right Jory? Jory?

Jory: I.. feel, kinda funny...

???: *Hmmm...

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Jory: Where are we?

Ven: Ugh, my head is spinning...

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---
END Part Two
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#3 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:13 PM

Alright! Here's the final part to my prologue. There are a lot more stills than animations and more dialogue, but I needed it. Anyway. With out further adieu. I admit it is a little boring... but this sets up the plot, so deal with it.
---

Prologue:
Desert Wanderer

Part Three (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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Ven: How long have we been going this direction?

Jory: Stop asking.

Ven: ...

...This is taking forever...

...My feet can't take much more walking...

...Do you even know where you're going?

Jory: How can you expect me to know my way around the desert?

Ven: Uhhh....... I'm so thirsty...

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Jory: Your complaining isn't helping.

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Ven: Wasn't it you who dragged me out of my house to go on this crazy adventure? In case you didn't know, I was comfortable in my nice cozy house. I say it's only fair you put up with it.

Jory: Fine! Be my guest. Complain yourself to death, but when you're all out of energy, you'll have no one to blame but yourself.

Ven: Say what you want. This desert wont best me..







---
30 minutes later
---

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Ven: I think I'm dying.

Jory: Please... Shut up.

Ven: Now there's sand in my shorts...

Jory: ...

---
Even Later...
---

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.

..

...

*Yawn

Jory: Huh? I'm alive, but where..?

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Jory: What is this place? And what happened to all the sand?

???: Hehe. This place is my home.

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Jory: Ah! Who are you!?

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???: Hahaha.. You're funny. My name is Cole.

Jory: W-what am I doing here and where is Ven!?

Cole: My father found you sleeping out beyond the rim. Such a strange place for people to take a nap.

Jory: Nap?

Cole: By the way, your friend sure does snore real loud. Why are you all the way out here? Visiting?

Jory: I wouldn't say I'm visiting. We're both sort of lost.

Cole: Sure is a big place to get lost...

Man's Voice: Cole. Have you disturbed our young guest's sleep?

Cole: No father.

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???: Ah, so you're awake.

Jory: Is it true you rescued us from the sand sea?

???: Yes. I brought you here.

Jory: If it wasn't for you, I would be dead right now.

???: Haha... I'll take that as your thanks, but enough of that. You two seem awfully young to be traveling alone... What were you doing out beyond the rim? You should know that is no place for outsiders.

Cole: Father, you're being rude. You haven't even told him your name yet.

???: Your right. I've forgotten to introduce myself. You may call me Ashur. A pleasure to make your acquaintance.

Jory: Um. Thank you, Ashur. My name is Jory.

Ashur: Well then, my young master. Please, tell us your story...

.
..
...

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Ven: And that's how we ended up in this sandy hell hole.

Jory: (Ven! Watch it. These people live here)

Ashur: So you say you were teleported here, by a robbed man?

Jory: That's right. He looked very ominous and had a dark way about him.

Ashur: And were did you say you were from?

Ven: We live in a town named Oakridge.

Ashur: ... On what continent?

Ven: Um...

Jory: Well...

Cole: Hahahahaa...

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Ashur: Cole, it's not polite to laugh. Can't you see these boys are stranded? I can tell by your skin you are not from these parts. Perhaps you are from the east, but there lies a mountain range to the north that blocks passage by foot. Still, there is another way.

Jory: Could you take us there?

Ashur: I'm afraid I can't do that.

Ven: What? Why not?

Ashur: We are currently entering the desert's dry season. Any attempts of reaching the pass would only greet us with disaster.

Jory: We could just wait out the dry spell and leave here when it's over, right? How long does the season last?

Ashur: Three years.

Jory: What!?

Ven: That aint right.

Ashur: I wish not to endanger myself or my son. So we will be staying here for the next three years. I suggest that you do the same, young masters.

Jory: It doesn't sound like we have much of a choice.

Ashur: I'm sorry. All I can offer you is a place to stay. We"ll have enough provisions to support the four of us. And if you like, I can teach you self defense and train you how to wield a blade.

Ven: O.K. I'm in.

Cole: Wicked! This is going to be awesome!

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Jory: Thank you again, Ashur. We'll stay as your guests.

Ashur: That settles it then. Welcome! To our oasis!


---
END Part Three
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

user posted image

#4 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:18 PM

In chapter one you'll be introduced to the same characters, just four years later. The dry season has lasted longer than expected, preventing the group from passing across the desert surface, extending the wait an extra year. The Desert Wanderer has kept his promise and delivered the two heroes to a traveling caravan. Here they will journey together through the mountain pass until they reach their destination; the port town of Stonecoast.
-----

Chapter One: The Journey Begins

Part A (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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Jory: There you are, Ven. I was looking all over for you.

Ven: I was just packing some things...

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Jory: ...

Ven: ...

Jory: I've been thinking...

Ven: Hey! Check it out. I've been working on my tan. What do you think?

Jory: Hahaha..

Ven: Look, even my hair has changed color.

Jory: What are you a rabbit?

Ven: Yup. Lookin' for some bunny love.

Jory: Haha... I'm glad our time here hasn't dulled your sense of humor.

Ven: Much to your dismay, I don't think it will ever change. I'll always be here to pester you.

Jory: You might not believe it, but that means a lot to me.

Cole: Yo! I didn't interrupt an intimate moment did I?

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Jory: No. Don't worry.

Ven: Look who it is. Mister Desert Hero in training. How fair the spirits today?

Cole: And what is that supposed to mean?

Jory: Is your father ready to speak to us? He said he had something to give me.

Cole: He's just outside the caravan, on the outskirts of the sand sea.

Jory: Thank you. Ven, I'll meet up with you later.

...

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Jory: Master Ashur, you called for me.

Ashur: I'm glad you came.

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Ashur: Do you know why I called you out here?

Jory: Because we've reached the mountain pass, right?

Ashur: Yes. I want you to have this. It's a map. From what you've told me, you know little about the lands we inhabit. This will be invaluable to you, so take good care of it. You'll notice I've added markers where you should seek out information about your hometown.

Jory: I'm very grateful for what you've done. We were only strangers when you found us, yet you've raised us as if we were your own blood. I'll never forget your kindness.

Ashur: There was one thing I would like to ask of you.

Jory: Anything.

Ashur: I need you to take my son, Cole, with you on you travels.

...

Ven: What?!

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Cole: Is there something wrong?

Ven: Well, when was this decided?

Cole: We are a nomadic people. At least that is what my father says. It's a rite of passage I must take.

Ven: Hmph... No one told me.

Cole: Heh. Afraid I might make your swordplay look bad?

Ven: What.... Take that back!

Jory: So you've heard? We'll be taking Cole with us.

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Ven: ...

Cole: I'm sorry, I may have angered him.

Jory: Cole, your father has already left. He mentioned a meeting with an old friend and that he would rendezvous with you in Trilon at the Rosewind tavern. He also wanted me to tell you "May the spirits of fortune guide you on your journey."

Cole: Sounds like him.

Jory: I've talked with the rest of the caravan. We leave in the morning, so be prepared.

Cole: Right!

Ven: ... Hmph.

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Cole: Did I offend him or something?

Jory: I wouldn't worry about it. That's just Ven.

Cole: I see.

.
..
...
Later that night

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Jory: Thought I'd find you out here. You alright? Hey... Ven?

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Ven: Yeah, stop poking me already. I was just thinking...

Jory: That's a change for the better.

Ven: Seriously, no jokes this time... What if we were to go home and no one remembers us?

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Jory: Try not to think that way. I know they will.

Ven: How can you say that? It's been four years. How do you know your sister is even still ali-

...I'm sorry.

Jory: ... It's fine. Just be ready to leave in the morning.


-----END Part A
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

user posted image

#5 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:21 PM

Chapter One: The Journey Begins

Part B (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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Jory: You two just about ready to go?

Ven: Yeah. Let's get the hell out of here.

Jory: I'll let the others know. but first, we need to take down this tent.

Cole: Yes sir!

Jory: Please Cole, no formalities.

Ven: ... Could you stop being so eager. It's annoying.

Cole: Shit, I'm just excited... It's not every day I get to visit Stonecoast.

...

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Jory: We're all ready to go sir.

Caravan Leader: Alright let's get on with it. Everyone! We're movin'!

...

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Cole: Wow! such a large caravan. It must be because of the long dry season...

Jory: Cole, I was curious...

Cole: Yeah, what is it?

Jory: It's just, we stayed a long time with you and your father. He told us a little about your life and the places he's been, but your mother was never mentioned.

Cole: Oh...


Jory: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to touch on a sensitive subject, I just-

Cole: No, no. It's fine. I... I never met my mother. The desert and my father's training is all I've ever known. Well that and Stonecoast.

Jory: ...

Ven: Sounds like you've been sheltered.

Cole: Not really. Stonecoast is a cool place, but I've only been there four times... I'm sure you'll find it interesting.

Ven: Look! I can see the mountains from here.

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Cole: That means we're getting close. About another couple hours or so before we reach the port.

Ven: It's so nice to see something other than dunes of sand...

Jory: Hahaha. I know what you mean.

.
..
...

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Cole: The caravan should be fine. We can go on ahead if you like.

Ven: Hey, I'll race you there.

Cole: You're on!

Jory: Wait a second..

Ven: Set... Go!

Jory: ...

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They left me...

...

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Ven: Check out all the people. Ah... Civilization. Let's get some food!

Old Man: *Mumble, mumble. Ah, pardon me young man.

Ven: Oh, excuse me.

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Jory: First thing we need to do is find a ship that can get us to Arcannor.

Ven: What's in Arcannor that interests us?

Jory: If you would pay more attention you'd have remembered. Ashur said there was a man I should meet.

Ven: Oooh... How mysterious.

Cole: Is he always like this?

*Punch

Cole: Ow!

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Ven: Get used to it.

Jory: Alright, knock it off. Let's go find the shipyard.


------END Part B
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

user posted image

#6 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:27 PM

Part C of Chapter 1. Still in StoneCoast, special thanks to TheReaper and Maverick for letting me use their mugs.
-----

Chapter One: The Journey Begins

Part C (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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Cole: Hmm... The water looks so calming.. It's nothing like the wind and sand.

Jory: It's a welcome sight.

Cole: I love to come here. It's even better at night.

Jory: ...

...

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*Laughter ... *Busy Street Sounds
...

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Cole: The fresh sea breeze is wonderful.

Jory: ... Where is Ven. He said he would meet us. He should be here by now.

Cole: Ah, don't worry about it. He probably saw something that caught his eye. Let me show you around.
...

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Ven: Huh? Oh right, the shipyard.
...

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Cole: I used to eat here when I was a kid. It hasn't changed a bit...

Jory: He's not here..

Cole: Let's just wait for him here. It's a small town, he's bound to show up.

Jory: I have a feeling giving Ven money was a bad decision. He should know not to throw any away.

...

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Ven: Now this is nice. Cool sea air, busy town. Why couldn't we have come here a year ago?

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Ven: .... Huh? Purple hair? Who was that?

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Ven: What!? My pouch is missing and... the map is gone! That purple haired punk just ripped me off...

...
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Cole: So, what do you think?

Jory: Nice atmosphere, but I really think we should be going...

???: Hey watch out!

*Thud ... *Crash

Drunken Man: Hey! What's the big idea?

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Jory: I'm sorry, Sir.

Drunk: You can't just knock over a man's.. drink and expect an a.. apology to work.

Jory: I'm sorry it was an accident, honest.

Cole: It looks like you've had plenty anyway.

Drunk: Shutp up, you lousy scarab.

Cole: (Slob). Don't you think it's a little early to be this drunk?

Drunk: Whataya talkin' about? You sound like my wife.

Bar Patron: What's going on here. Are you gonna pay for this?

Cole: (Great another one)

Bar Patron: You just say something smart?

Jory: Nothing, he said nothing. We'll just be leaving now.

Drunk: Not so fast! You're gonna pay for my drink. In fact, you can pay for my friends too. Hahaha

Cole: What?

Drunk: Are we gonna have a problem?

...
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Jory: How did it come to this?

Cole: The way I see it, we're doing a service to society.

Jory: I don't want to hurt anyone.

Cole: (This should be easy).

Thug: What did you say!? Come on, fight me!

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*Chink

Drunk: Whoa, backup isn't fair. I'm out of here.

Thug: You got lucky.

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.



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Ven: *Huff huff... Where the hell is that thief?

*Huff... Don't worry, Jory Isn't going to know.

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Ven: Ha! Found you.


.

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Jory: Thank you. That was resolved easier than expected..

???: You shouldn't pick fights, you know.

Jory: It was a mistake. I had no idea he was right behind me, I mean...

Cole: He was asking for it.

???: ...You. You're name is Cole right?

Cole: !... Um, yes. It is, but how do you know that?

???: I am an acquaintance of your father's. The name is Jackson.

Cole: Actually, I remember seeing you from somewhere.

Jackson: That is possible. I've met with your father on several occasions. It must have been in that bar, three years ago, that we first met. You've grown much taller since then.

Cole: So he's in town then?

Jackson: No. I have already spoken with him. Out on business I'm afraid, but he's asked me to look after you. That is until you've found passage out of StoneCoast. Lucky for you, I know a guy who knows a guy. Follow me.

Jory: ...Ven.

.


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Ven: Look, just hand over my lifted goods and we'll call it even. I have you cornered.

???: I stole this money fair and square. It belongs to me now.

Ven: What!? You're crazy. Give it back..

Thief: ...

Ven: I'll take this...

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Thief: You can't have it back.

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Ven: Ow! Ok, fine. Tell me one good reason why you should have that gold.

Thief: ... ... It's just enough..

Ven: ...

Thief: ..Meaning, it's all I need to get away from here.

Ven: *Sigh. What a coincidence, that's my story. What would make you want to leave?

Thief: That has nothing to do with you. I'll have you know, I'm not your common thief. I just happened to be short of the cash.

Ven: Thanks.

Thief: Hey! Give that back!

Ven: Nope. Starving would've been an acceptable answer.

Thief: You're joking... That isn't fair. Get back here!


-----END Part C
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

user posted image

#7 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:33 PM

Thanks to Espilion for the character submission and Enter the Black Knight for letting me use his Aimee
-----

Chapter 2: Bandits and Mercenaries

Part A (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

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Jed: You boys ready?

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Cole: Yes sir!

Ven: You sound awfully excited.

Cole: It's my first time on a boat, of course I am.

Jed: You can bet that you'll be runnin' into plenty of firsts on your journey. If your the son of the Ashur I guarantee it. Well, we'll be casting off within the hour, so don't go nowhere.

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Ven: You think the crew would be mad it I climbed the mast?

Jory: Hey get back here!

Ven: Hahahaha...

Cole: ... * Huh?

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Cole: Oh, it's you...

...

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Ven: Ah, at last. We are finally underway. What kind of place is Arcannor?

Jory: I don't know. I heard it was a big place, much larger than Stone Coast.

Ven: Remember how much we used to talk about this day?

Jory: Life was much more simple, then. I hope you understand that.

Ven: I was getting tired of the same routine. Plus all that sand. I don't know how people can live in these conditions.

Jory: It's called adaptation.. but I can agree. Being out in that desert only made me miss our home that much more.

Ven: Enough! We are finally free from that place, a celebration I say!

Jory: Celebrate, how?

Ven: With this. This bottle was the reason I was late in the first place. Apparently carrying around a sword makes you look older.

Jory: What! That's what you spent your money on. You said you were robbed!

Ven: I was... after I bought this. I couldn't tell you. A least we can celebrate with this.

Jory: You're incredible.

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Ven: Hey, Cole. Come check this out.

Cole: What is it?

Jackson: *Whistles

Jory: Who was that?

Jackson: Boys! Over here.

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Cole: You're Leaving? I thought you were going with us.

Jackson: Not this time. I'm expected somewhere else. Good luck with your journey!

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Ven: Who was that.

Cole: A friend. He sure was helpful. I wonder how he knew my father.

Ven: Whoever your father was, he sure is popular.

.
..
...

(Shortly after launch)

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Ven: Jed, was it?

Jed: Yeah, what is it boy? Speak up, I can't hear ye.

Ven: Could you tell me a little about where we're going?

Jed: Ah. So ye wan to know about Trafon? Or was Arcannor you was interested in?

Ven: First tell me about Trafon.

Jed: Well, not much to say. It's 'bout the same size as Stone Coast. The town lies close to the sea, 'bout the closest one to Arcannor, that is. So Trafon becomes a good place for trade. You could say it is a sister city to Arcannor. Both are cared for by a single family. They are noble and generous, or so I've heard. People are happy so time moves slow, must be pleasant. Too pleasant for my tastes though.

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We been making trips all through out this channel. From Trafon to Estor, even all the way out to Odali. None of them as peaceful as this place. But lately the place has been in an uproar.

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The king of Arcannor recently passed away. Nobody really knows how he died, the royal family 'as been all hush-hush 'bout it. With his death being so mysterious, people have been talkin'. I've heard some wild rumors, but I don't believe em. Now everyone is wondering who will assume his throne.

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The King's first born, Prince Felix is next in line. Then Prince Epsilon and finally Princess Aimee. Their mother died along time ago, during Aimee's birth, making the three siblings the only remaining nobles alive.

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Ven: Wow, you sure know a lot about where we're going.

Jed: When you've been around as long as I have, you come across information.

Ven: You could be a historian.

Jed: Don't get me started, that's all you'll hear from me.

...
..
.

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Melody: Fools. Men are so easy to manipulate, now where to hide... This was so easy!

*Feet descending on wooden stairs

Mel: *Gasp What? Someone's coming!

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Jory: Here, I better put this away before Ven starts celebrating.

Cole: How like him to celebrate over nothing.

Jory: He's trying to commemorate us leaving the desert. You think he's annoying now, wait till you see him drunk. Let me just put this over here.

Mel: *Eep... ....

Cole: You hear something just now?

Jory: Sounded like the ship creaking. Well, out of sight out of mind. You should have been there for when Ven broke into my parents stash back home. Man were we in trouble...

*Feet ascending on wooden stairs

.

Mel: Score!

...

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Melody: Ah! Tiran Brandy, a good choice. Just what I needed for a long, boring, boat ride. *Gulp* (>_<) *Shudder* That's strong.

...

Ven: You're telling me it's gone?

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Ven: The Brandy is gone!?

Jory: That's strange, I put it right there.

Ven: Why?... (T_T)


-----END Part A
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#8 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:39 PM



Here is part b of the second chapter. This one feels more like a filler. The entire sprite-fic so far has just been plot and scenery changes. I'll need time to make some animations so that I can incorporate more action. Any comments or suggestions, just let me know.
-----

Chapter 2: Bandits and Mercenaries

Part B (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

*Yawn

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Ven: Huh? Where is everyone? Oh no, don't tell me they left with out me!

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Ven: Jed, where did my friends go?

Jed: Ah! There you are me boy. The others have already left, said they'd meet you in town.

Ven: I must have overslept...

Jed: Overslept any longer and we may have taken you with us, hahaha.

Ven: Oh, well uhh... It's been a pleasure. Thanks again.

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Ven: Yo! Trying to leave without me?

Cole: Finally, there you are. We thought about it.

Ven: You miss me?

Cole: You sure took your time.

Ven: You didn't bother to wake me up, you know.

Jory: Enough, we should get moving. It'll take some time to get to Arcannor from here, about another days walk. Any more time we waste here the more daylight we lose.

Ven: Then what are we waiting for?

...

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Mel: uhhhh.... My head hurts.. Why did I drink so much? Water.. need water...

Jed: Hmm... Who's this?

Mel: uh- oh

Jed: You there! What are you doing aboard this vessel?

Mel: Who me? I'm just your average traveler. I noticed this wonderful boat while I was out.. walking around and thought I'd get a closer look.

Jed: I don't buy it missy, you don't look like you're from around here.

Mel: (I said I was a traveler...)

Jed: Who are you really? Actually, you look sorta familiar.

Mel: Oh don't worry, I'll just be on my way...

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Jed: Don't think you can just bat those pertty eye lashes of yers and just walk off that easily. I'm on to you.

Mel: ...

Jed: *Gasp* I know where I recognize you! Aren't you-

Mel: I'm sorry, I didn't want to do this.

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...

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Ven: I was thinking Jory, Why are we going to this city? What if Oakridge is nowhere near here?

Jory: I trust Sir Ashur, what would he gain by sending us on a wild goose chase? He did give us money.

Ven: Yeah... It sounds suspicious is all. Hey Cole! Keep up.

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Cole: I've never seen so much green. What a wonderful place. It's not even hot!

Jory: It is a lot like home, maybe we are close.

Cole: I noticed something too, from the road. Here, take a look at the map.

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Jory: It shows the forest right in front of us, but it says to walk around.

Ven: So what are you suggesting? We take a shortcut?

Cole: Look, I can see the castle from here, It may make up for lost time.

Ven: ...

Jory: If we could make it within the city walls before sun set it would be worth it.

...

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Ven: You know, maybe we should just follow the map...

Cole: There's a path.

Jory: Looks like we aren't the only ones who thought of this.

Cole: Maybe it leads straight to the other side. Come on, let's go!

Ven: ... Hey! Don't leave me out here.

...

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Ven: Wow, you were right. The path cuts right through the to forest.

Jory: This is great. Now we wont be locked out at night.

Ven: What!? Really?

Jory: I heard they close the gates. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be out here when the sun goes down.

Cole: I don't think I'd mind. I've discovered a new love for the outdoors.

Ven: Anyone who has spent their life in the desert would.

Cole: So you can understand how great it must be for me?

Ven: It's all fun and games until you're eaten by a bear.

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Cole: Good thing that bottle was lost, we may have never made it in one day.

Ven: Don't side with Jory... Losing that brandy was a catastrophe. We would have made it anyway with this handy shortcut.

Jory: Wasn't it you who wanted to stay on the road?

...

Elsewhere in the very same forest
...

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Shady Man: Boss.

Boss: What is it? Can't you see I'm in the middle of something?

Shady Man: Well, I was walking around and...

Boss: Well...

Shady Man: You're not going to like this...

Boss: Tell me! I haven't got all day.

Shady man: I-I spotted th-th-three men roaming the woods, boss.

Armored Man: What is this man talking about, Claude?

Claude: I don't know... You said no one knew about this. You've been honest with so far. You're not keeping things from me now, are you General Wrenne?

Wrenne: What exactly would I gain from that?

Claude: Everyone loves a hero. You could be plotting to turn me in for the bounty on me head. Could you pass that up?

Wrenne: Then I would have to seek out another ruthless bandit. I'd rather not go through that trouble again.

Claude: I still don't trust ye.

Wrenne: Fair enough... You! Thief! Go alert the others. I will not have them take us by surprise.

Shady Man: Yes sir, boss man, sir.

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Claude: ...

Wrenne: I have no reason to turn you in Bloodcrow. Heh, you've made me a wealthy man.

Claude: ...

Wrenne: You really should find more attractive help.

Claude: ...

Wrenne: .. *Cough* Still I'm curious, who stumbled upon our little operation.

Claude: Curious indeed. I will check on this myself. I don't trust you or your men, so don't follow me. Ready your archers, have them line the road, and hold this position until I get back.

Wrenne: (Fool... don't give me orders).

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Fighter: Halt!

Ven: Woah there fella, we're friendly.

Fighter: You don't look like Bloodcrow's men. What are you doing here?

Jory: We're just taking the shortcut here. Was it you who made this path?

Fighter: ... No one is allowed in this forest. Leave now!

Cole: Looks like he means business, maybe we should go...

Fighter: ...

Jory: Maybe that's wise. We don't want to make anyone angry...

Ven: Forget this! We wont make it there in time!


-----END Part B
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#9 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:44 PM

Chapter 2: Bandits and Mercenaries

Part C (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

Fighter: ...

Ven: Look. Maybe we got off on the wrong foot.

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Fighter: *Grunts*

Cole: Still doesn't look friendly.

Fighter: *Flashes axe*

Jory: Let's turn back. It seems he means business.

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Fighter: You best listen to your friend there, otherwise I'll snap yer neck, little man.

Cole: ...I think you should step aside. Or I'll make you.

Fighter: What did you say?

Cole: I said move!

Fighter: Huh? Wait... you!

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Fighter: Ah! ..ugh.

Ven: Guess that takes care of that.

Cole: Talking wasn't working.

Jory: Granted. Anything about that seem strange to you? What was his reason for being here?

Ven: You're right, telling us to leave like that... It was as if we had offended him somehow.

Cole: He was guarding something.

Ven: Like what?

Jory: Looks like we are going to find out. We better get moving and fast.

Cole: He seemed quite confident. I suspect he has friends nearby..

...

Meanwhile

...

Melody: Crap, crap, crap. I lost my link with that boy. If that stupid guy hadn't stopped me I wouldn't have lost track of them.

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..

Melody: So I take a left here and follow this path? Easy enough. At least the oaf knew how to get to Arcannor, not to mention his fat wallet. Hehe.

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Mel: From what he said, I need to reach the city before nightfall. I wont be able to sneak in without making a scene... How far is it anyway?

Listen to me talk to myself...

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Mel: What a stroke of luck! Who would have thought I would find a way out of Stone Coast so soon? What a strange group of men... Anyway, I bet mother and father are furious! *Smiles

???: You there!

Mel: !!

???: Don't move.

Mel: Oh, you scared me. How long have you-

Man: Look, I'm mugging you, girlie. Now hand over the goods!

Mel: Oh.. Ha ha. Can't we just talk about this...?

Man: Stop, don't look at my face! Just hand over your money.

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Mel: Alright, ok. Don't do anything hasty (You've got to be kidding me).

Man: Don't get smart with me, little lady. Traveling alone and unarmed? This is almost unfair. And look! She's loaded too! Ha ha ha!

Mel: I wouldn't take me so lightly.

Man: Yeah, right. I'm scared. My boss will never believe how I got this. I know! Why don't you come with me. He can meet you for himself.

Mel: That's not going to happen.

*Screams*

Man: Huh? What was that?

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*Screaming*

Man: What!? What's happening?

Mel: I warned you.

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Back inside the woods...

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Jory: This is harder than I thought it would be.

Ven: ...

Cole: Stay on your guard.

Ven: Here's a side of Cole I've never seen before.

Cole: This is your first fight, isn't it?

Jory: Yes.

Cole: You did alright, but we need to keep moving.

Ven: Alright!? That's all you can say? That guy was huge an-

Cole: No! You need to focus.

Ven: !

Jory: Quiet, now is not the time. Cole, what are we up against?

Cole: They look like regular bandits. Easy enough, but I can guarantee more will show.

Ven: Right... So much for the shortcut.

Jory: Let's move!

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...

Mel: What a fool. Who turns their back on their target, even if she is a girl?

Hmm.. let's see here... Looks a little burnt, but it's still all here. Thanks for nothing, jerk.

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*Kick*
...

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Jory: Okay. We're back on the path. Now what? Where are the rest of 'em?

Ven: Getting ready to ambush us, no doubt. It's not like we were really quiet back there.

Cole: Where is Jackson when you need him?

???: You there!

Jory: ! Get ready..

???: What are you doing in these woods?

Ven: Show yourself!

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???: I'm the one making the demands here!

Ven: I said show yourself!

???: Heh, As you wish...

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-----END Part C
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#10 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:49 PM

Chapter 2: Bandits & Mercenaries

Part D (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

-----

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Leader: Here we are. So, what's it going to be, lad?

Ven: ...

Leader: Look at this, their just children. You know, you shouldn't be playin wif knives.

Bandits: Hehehehe...

Leader: I don't know who you're supposed be, but you should know... we don't like uninvited guests. You see, this is our territory, it was a mistake for you to come.

Ven: Yeah, so we've gathered.

Jory: Ven, these men are dangerous. Try not to provoke them.

Leader: Best listen to yer friend.

Bandits: Hehehehe.

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Jory: We were only passing through, so if you don't mind..

Leader: 'Aint nobody leaving. I let you go, you tell the guard. I'm not gonna let that happen. You think I'm stupid or something?

Ven: ...

Leader: Now that's a good lad.

Cole: Who are you people?

Leader: What's that? Us? These cutthroats are the fearsome Bloodcrow Bandits. And I? I am their Leader. You may call me Claude.

Ven: A pleasure...

Bandits: Hahahaha.

Claude: We saw what you did to some of our boys. I must admit, I'm a bit impressed. What do you think I'm supposed to do 'bout it?

Jory: I'm sure we can work something out.

Claude: 'Fraid not. What you did is unforgivable.

Jory: ... Then What do you suggest?

Claude: Heh... Attack!

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...



Mel: Looks like it's getting late. Do the guardsmen really turn people away at the gates?

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Mel: Huh? Wait, who is that? I didn't even noticed them... What's going on around here?

...

Jory: This is not looking good. We're surrounded

Cole: How many are there?

Ven: No time. Here they come again!

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Bandit: *Hurk! Die... you.. punk.

Ven: Get off of me you fat slob!

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*Clang* *Chink*

Claude: Huh... Where did these kids learn to fight? They could be soldiers. Maybe they are with the guard. Speaking of sold-

Bandit: Boss!

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Claude: Damn it! What do you want!?

Bandit: Um.. It's general Wrenne, Boss. He's disappeared and has taken a lot of gold wif him!

Claude: The coward! Don't worry, we'll find him later.

Bandit: But they're tearing us apart!

Claude: Fine then. I'll just have to step in.

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Jory: Looks like they're retreating.

Ven: Ha! Nothing we couldn't handle.

Jory: You're too arrogant sometimes.

Cole: You're right. What amateurs.

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Jory: Ven! Look out!

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Claude: Guh...

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Ven: Whoa!

Jory: Ven!

Ven: ...

???: Is everyone alright?

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Ven: Yes. I'm okay, but who are you?

???: There is no time to explain here. It's getting dark and those who have fled will return for their supplies. Follow me. Have no worries, I can be trusted.

Jory: What should we do?

Ven: ... He did just save our hides back there. I trust him.

Cole: I say follow him, it may be our best option.

Jory: Alright then, lead the way.

???: Good choice. Come on then.

...

Meanwhile

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Mel: Ha! Made it, and with time to spare. Melody, you are amazing.

...

A few hours later

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Cole: We're too late!

???: Yes, the gates will be closed, but there is somewhere else we can go. This way.

...

???: In here. Make yourselves at home.

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???: Let me just lock the door.

Cole: Oh boy, a bed! I'm so tired I could use a rest.

Ven: (Jory, what's the matter? You've been quiet this whole time)

Jory: (I don't know. There is something I don't like about this)

Ven: (I know what you mean. I feel like we are trapped in here)

???: We should be safe in here, but don't get too comfortable. There are still some things I want to talk about.

Jory: I think you owe us some answers.

???: Ah, yes. My apologies. I expect you would like an explanation. But first...

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???: Let me introduce myself. I am Prince Epsilon of the Royal Arcannor family. It is a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance.

Cole: !

Ven: A prince!?

Epsilon: Yes, that is correct. And since I have revealed myself I would like to know your names as well.

Jory: Of course. My name is Jory. This is my childhood friend, Ven. And our companion here is..

Cole: I'm Cole. Nice to meet ya.

Jory: We are traveling from the west in search of a man named Grant.

Epsilon: Hmm... The name sounds familiar. I may be able to help you with that. First I would like to thank you. Those bandits have been terrorizing the roads around these parts for weeks. With the death of their leader things will return to normal, eventually. In time I would like to thank you properly, but that will have to wait. This next part is a bit more complicated, so you may want to pull up a chair.

Cole: What, no rest?


-----END Chapter 2

For whatever reason, tinypic (or someone else) doesn't like this chapter and images have been deleted. I've had to edit this several times to fix it, so a heads up; if there are missing or messed up frames, this is why.
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#11 Cheshire

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Posted 02 September 2012 - 06:55 PM

In this section I'm releasing an extra chapter, Chapter 2x. It's basically plot filler that explains part of the main story line that has, for the most part, been left wide open since the prologue. It takes place two years prior to the main story's timeline in another city named Odali. It centers around a young spy named Jasper who does reconnaissance for his county's military. A little bit of foreshadowing for anyone who has an interest in the story and two new key characters for future chapters for those who like the pretty pictures.

Sorry, no animated frames in this bonus chapter.
-----

Chapter 2x

Odali Incident (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)


The far east, in the Odali capital. Two years earlier...

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Jasper: I finally made it back home. I should find 'The Captain' before I report back. Don't want to be sent out on another errand before I have time to catch up. Where is he anyway?

-----

Guard Captain: Men! Fall in line! Quickly now, tardiness will not be tolerated.

Guards: Yes Sir!

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Guard Captain: I want to see an extra effort in today's training. From now on I'm going to push you lot even harder. I've gone easy on you in the past few weeks, so no more slacking, understood?

Guardsman: Easy!? You call tha-

Guard Captain: And there will be no complaining! Got that?

Guardsman: Yeah, but-

Guard Captain: Understood!?

Guards: Yes Sir!

Guard Captain: That's more like it.

-----

Jasper: Ha! I found you.

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Jasper: Oi! Garret, over here!

Garret: Huh, who's that?

Jasper: What do you mean; Who's that? You mean to tell me you don't recognize your own brother?

Garret: Brother! It's good to see you! Have you been to see the war council yet?

Jasper: No, not yet. You're the first I've spoken with since I've returned.

Garret: Really? I'm flattered. To see me before that girl...

Jasper: Um...

Garret: Things not going so well?

Jasper: I'd rather not say... Listen. Can we talk somewhere private?

Garret: Sure. Men! Listen up. I'll be back to whip you lazy dogs into shape. Until then, no lounging, or there will be hell to pay. You're part of the royal guard, act like it.

-----

Jasper: Okay, here will do.

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Garret: What's the matter? What's all this sneaking around for?

Jasper: I've never been one for crowds.

Garret: Aye, this is true. So, how fares the mission? Tiran as uncivilized and barbarous as they say?

Jasper: Yes, but far less than they would have you believe. Even I was surprised at how easy it was to move around...

Garret: Maybe I should go visit sometime.

Jasper: Hate to say it, but you wouldn't last long if you show up in that armor. Anyway, I retrieved the documents easily enough, though I'm sure once it's discovered they are missing, there will be quite a stir.

Garret: Ha! That's my brother!

Jasper: Hahaha.. Those mercenaries really are an uncoordinated group... They did give me some trouble though, but enough about my mission. How's life as 'Guard Captain'?

Garret: Hmph.

Jasper: You don't sound too pleased. Not what you expected?

Garret: I'm not pleased by your attitude. Guard Captain is more than a title -

Jasper: Yes, yes. I understand

Garret: - And it's a lot of hard work. Just this week, I had -

Jasper: Yes, yes. I understand...

Garret: - my responsibility. So I wont have you-

Woman: Excuse us.

Jasper: Huh?

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Official:These two are nobody. Pay them no mind, Lady Raeka.

Raeka: As you wish, Lord Dominic. You were saying.

Jasper: Tch...

Dominic: Just a moment, I'll catch up with you soon.

Raeka: As you say.

Dominic: Hmm... Jasper, was it?

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Jasper: ...

Garret: Jasper, answer him.

Dominic: Come now. Speak when you're addressed, boy.

Jasper: Yes, what is it?

Dominic: That's better. I believe your presence was requested. I suggest you find your way to the war council, immediately. It's rude to keep the king and his men waiting.

Jasper: ... Of course.

Dominic: Great. I'll take my leave then.

Jasper: ...

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Garret: I know you don't like him, but you have to-

Jasper: Stop. Before we joined the military we never had to put with this type of thing.

Garret: I know, but life is better this way. Aside from putting up with the stuck-up nobles there are some perks. Like meeting beautiful women such as Lady Raeka.

Jasper: Who is she anyway?

Garret: I heard she is a relative of the king. And to think she willingly joined the army.

Jasper: That is... curious.

Garret: She is stunning, though, isn't she? Maybe I could introduce you two.

Jasper: Don't get carried away.

Garret: Hahahaha!

Jasper: Alright, enough. There is something else I wanted to talk to you about.

Garret: Ha! I knew it. You can't hide anything from your big brother.

Jasper: Perhaps... Look, while I was in Tiran I heard some things.

Garret: Was this part of the Intel you collected?

Jasper: No, rumors. But what I heard does ring true.

Garret: What are trying to say?

Jasper: It has to do with us. Odali is in some sort of trouble.

Garret: You were just swayed by the ramblings of a drunk. How can you be so sure? It's not like you were ever supportive of the order 'round here.

Jasper: I did a little digging for myself. As it turns out, Odali is not the only country looking for information on its neighbors. This should come as no surprise, but the next part might. Apparently it's no secret that our political assembly and war council has been infiltrated by another group.

Garret: Corruption then? This is all news to me.

Jasper: The same goes for me. But there's more. Very little is known about the group, as they seem to have appeared out of nowhere. I believe their intentions are bad, possibly dark. Lord Dominic may be an insider. I wont say more, for I fear I may be detained for threat of conspiracy.

Garret: This is all very troubling, brother. To think that something like this may be happening under our noses is... Regardless, I am a proud knight of the Odali Royal Guard and must uphold my responsibility of that title.

Jasper: I know, but I must go before I raise suspicion. They are waiting for me after all. Do keep this between us, such information could be dangerous. Stay safe, brother.

-----

Dominic: So, you've finally come. What took you?

King of Odali: Lord Dominic, must you be so trite? This young man has done us a favor, show some respect.

Dominic: Yes your majesty.

Jasper: Thank you, your majesty.

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King: So now, please present the documents you've secured.

Jasper: Yes, of course. Right away. Here they are.

King: Wonderful! This will give us insight into the motivation of the Mercenary Guild. You've done us a great service.

Dominic: Well done. Now, you may leave.

King: Ah, but...

Dominic: He's done his part. We have no further use for him.

King: I suppose you're right. Be sure to see the Guard Captain before you leave the castle, he'll have your pay ready. We'll send for you when we have need of your serv-

Dominic: Alright, enough idle talk, let us resume our strategy. Guard, please escort this young man to the Captain's office.

Guardsman: Sir.

Jasper: Thank you again, your majesty.

King: ...

-----

Garret: So that's it?

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Jasper: Yeah, I was nearly thrown out of the assembly, treated like I had been caught stealing food from the larder.

Garret: You are a thief you know.

Jasper: Yes, but this was different.

Garret: I wonder what was so important about those papers.

Jasper: I don't know. They were just records. Contracts with the names of people the guild did business with. Whatever the real reason, his Lord Dominic didn't want me to find out.

Garret: Maybe he suspects something. Maybe he knows you're questioning his authority, like some kind of nobility's sixth sense whenever their power is threatened. Ha!

Jasper: Don't be ridiculous. Though that could be potentially dangerous, considering the missions I've been receiving lately.

Garret: What's this?

Jasper: Maybe it's my imagination, but the jobs. They're getting more and more risky every time, like the next one will be my last.

Garret: Sounds like you're starting to believe those rumors after all.

Jasper: I deal with hard evidence. That's my job after all. What would I gain from that anyway. I'm not looking to be anybody's hero. I just want to get paid. Speaking of which, I believe you have something of mine.

Garret: Here, take it. Such a gracious soul. To be of my own blood, warms the heart.

Jasper: Enough of the pleasantries, brother.

Garret: Ha!

Jasper: I'm off to have a drink. Find me in town tomorrow and I'll tell you more about Tiran.

Garret: Aye! Stay safe brother.

-----

A couple hours later

Garret: Where would a stuck up aristocrat keep all his important documents...

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Garret: What's this? Ah! A secret compartment, you crafty bastard. Now I know why Jasper loves his job. This is exhilarating!

-----

*quiet steps

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Jasper: The coast is clear. Hmm... it's almost too quiet. Where is the guard?

-----

*rustling papers

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Garret: Why does he have a floor plan of the castle stored in here? What's this? Documents detailing the king's known ancestors, allergies and personal habits. And, last but not least, a letter addressed to Dominic, the man in question. It's not very long, but it seems to be written in code, signed Q. Jasper was right, he can wait till tomorrow to hear about this. The king must be notified at once.

???: I'm sorry, but that's not going to happen.

Garret: Who's there!?

-----

Jasper: What was that? It came from the assembly office.

*running footsteps

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Jasper: There was a scuffle in here. So I was right... Wait. Why is there blood here? What do I do? Someone must have had the same idea to check Dominic's belongings. Oh no, Garret...

-----

Jasper: The blood trail is getting thinner, but still no sign of Garret. What were you thinking, Sneaking around in heavy armor? You fool...

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Jasper: What? It just ends? This does not make sense... Strange.. Something is off about this stone.

*press

Jasper: Whoa!

*stone sliding

Jasper: A door? This does not look promising.

-----

Jasper: I think I've made it to the bottom. Huh? Do I hear chanting?

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Jasper: (That's Garret! But who is that?)

*Rumble

Jasper: (What strange energy, something is wrong here)

*Louder Chanting

Jasper: Ugh... (I can't... move)

*Loud chanting

Jasper: (What an awful feeling)

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Jasper: !!! (What the hell is that!?)

???: I have brought you another sacrifice.

Creature: Excellent. This offering will do nicely.

Jasper: (Oh no. No... Garret... I'm so sorry. I have to get out of here)

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???: Hmm? Did you sense something just now?

Creature: It appears you have an uninvited guest. You said this dungeon was secure!

???: My apologies. This wont happen again.

Creature: I have been seen.

???: Don't worry I'll take full responsibility. Please, just accept this offering.

Creature: Be grateful I don't take you as well.

???: If you'll excuse me.

-----

Jasper: ha.. ha.. I have to get out of here! ha..

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Jasper: ha.. Somewhere they'll never find me. ha.. Garret. Please forgive me. I was too late.

-----

Two years later

Ven: So what's all this about; trouble at the castle?

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Epsilon: I hope you're prepared for this...


-----End Chapter 2x



And that concludes my progress for Retribution.
Unless someone expresses their desire to see more from me, I think this is dead.
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#12 arimibn

arimibn

    The Darkslayer

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Posted 05 September 2012 - 01:35 AM

*sees Melody*

She looks oddly familiar...

BECKY. RECOLOR.
"You'll never forgive me? Like I give a damn."
"You got a jacked up notion of fair play pal...and it's beginning to piss me off."
"Though a fight every now and again does make life a little more interesting...dontcha think?"
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^ This isn't dead, I swear!
Most of my closest friends have qualities that I despise. But I love them all regardless of their faults.
"Why are we trying to narrow God's mercy? I didn't realize there was a limit to how many people could go to heaven."

This will not be removed until I finish my Sprite Series. Arim and AJ VS The World Started December 19, 2013 (I actually still haven't given up on this! XD)

This will not be removed until The Demon Invasion is finished. Started December 19, 2013 (Hue)

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#13 Cheshire

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Posted 22 August 2013 - 08:42 PM

I'm a little disappointed I only got 1 reply on this entire thing... sad.gif
QUOTE
"Boney gets a boney thinking about Chesh's purring cat."

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#14 SmashedFish

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Posted 23 August 2013 - 01:58 AM

Hey, Chesh! I must not have noticed this earlier, or I would've posted, so et me fix that.


Chapter 2- I believe I said something similar in your sprite topic, but I love your animations and fight scenes. The way you take Fire Emblem-style sprites and backgrounds and reuse them to get such a different-seeming result is very cool, and the end product is awesome to behold! Plot-wise, this is a very important seeming chapter, though I'm sure this twist is the least of what's coming up. All in all, well done!

2x- Even more plot twists, oh boy. It's disconcerting to think that the nameless individual and the demon have been around for two years, but I'm sure things will become even more interesting as a result.

That's all I have the time to say for now, but well done! I quite enjoy your writing and graphics, and I hope you'll make more at some point.

Images - 11/22 Writing - 5/17 FE: Immortal Shrine
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Need help with hacking? Post in the subforum, or Skype me (smashedfish76).


#15 Fire Blazer

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    You ready?

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Posted 23 August 2013 - 02:02 AM

Most of us are just lazy readers/writers

Look at me I don't even read my own stories. Final draft? My first draft IS my final draft

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Signature thanks to Shu.





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